Today, I’m grateful for repentance. Never in my life have I felt like I need it more.

Adjusting to mothering three small people has been difficult. Honestly, there are some days that things go smoothly and I feel happy and confident in this role and I am able to role with the punches (sometimes literal ;) ). But other days, like today, I flounder.

Between an emotional toddler, a questioning preschooler, and a baby struggling with naps I sometimes feel stretched until I snap. And I do snap. I used to pride myself on my ability to stay in control of my emotions. I decided that I didn’t want to yell, and I didn’t. But these days staying in control is harder and harder.

I have only been a mother of three for three months, but if I’ve learned anything these past three months, it’s that I cannot do it alone. Raising these three beautiful children of mine is harder than I can handle. I am not enough. But. There is help.

This summer, Devon has had several work-related trips and each time I’ve been overwhelmed with divine help, from friends and heaven. I cannot deny that God loves me and my kids and even when all that I am is not enough, He will make up the difference.

This motherhood gig is like humility training camp. It’s a magnifying glass, a pressure cooker. This is tough stuff–hard work. But we are not alone.

“Don’t you quit. You keep walking. You keep trying. There is help and happiness ahead. . . You keep your chin up. It will be all right in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come.” -Jeffrey R. Holland

I’m so grateful for a chance to change. I am grateful for hope. Though my mistakes have grown in number, I have to say, I am getting better and better at trying again.



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